February means Valentine's day or at least that's what the greeting card companies would like you to believe. It always comes to mixed reviews. It depends a lot on your situation or maybe your lack there of. Either way, we shouldn't forget that it is a ploy of big business to play upon our emotions and pressure us into increasing their sales. How many misinterpreted offers of candy and ill-advised engagements have happened in the name of St. Valentine? Who needs it?
If we were back in ancient Rome at this time of year we would be preparing to celebrate 4 days of drunken revelry... Lupercalia. There would be all manner of situations available to us and we would diligently participate in all of them. This would be the time when we would encourage the young God Lupercus to grow into his manhood and move that wheel of the year over one more click. The crops depended on it. Sounds like just more pressure to me.
There has to be some middle ground between corporate greed and ancient craziness. So here we stand in modern Pagan Paradise where all forms of love and pleasure are Her ritual. Blessed be!
But still There is one form of love that many of us struggle with: self-love. It's safe to say that at some point, we've all faced challenges in loving ourselves.
How can we love others if we don't first love ourselves? It's impossible to give what we don't possess. I've met many wonderful, loving individuals who generously give to others yet suffer in silence because they don't receive love in return. This lack of reciprocation can lead to resentment towards those they care about. Learning to love oneself and actively practicing self-love can create a rich and sustainable source of love to share with others.
As we embrace this season of Love, let's explore it from the inside out. Considering ways to indulge and show love to ourselves might just lead to a greater sense of love among those around us.
Just Say No
Learning to say no, even to loved ones, may seem odd but it often leads to better outcomes. Agreeing to do things you don't want to, just to please others, isn't truly loving. It's healthier to find activities that bring joy to both you and the person you care about.
Guard Your Energy
Protect your energy. Each morning when you wake up, you have the opportunity to shape the day with your choices and actions. Throughout the day, unforeseen events may occur, but only you can determine their impact on you. You have the power to select your emotions, assign meanings to events, and control your responses. Safeguard your energy, for when you start to feel disheartened or your spirits dip, it can influence not just you, but also those around you. To honor yourself, opt for positive emotions and responses to whatever life presents. If you find yourself overwhelmed, seek support from friends. Then, re-enter the fray with a new perspective and progress. While friends can be crucial in lifting our spirits, learning to reframe experiences in real-time can help you remain steadfast more often.
Carve out me time
I understand you're busy; there's a lot to do every day. Many people spend their days helping others, both in personal and professional capacities. It's crucial to rejuvenate, recharge, and repair yourself daily. Sometimes, the only way to secure some personal time is to carve it out firmly! Just 15 minutes solely for yourself, free from all other duties, can suffice to recharge. Sit back, read a magazine, enjoy a cup of tea, take a soothing bath or a long, hot shower. Go for a walk or relax in nature. Disconnect your phone and step away from the computer. Guard your personal time diligently. Allow no interruptions. If you've never set aside time for yourself, you'll be astonished by the transformation it brings. It's akin to re-energizing with fresh batteries. You return revitalized, ready to contribute again. Those who truly love and understand you won't resent your need for a few moments alone. Seeing the positive change in you, they might even support it.
Forgive others
Harboring grudges or nurturing anger and resentment towards others only serves to weigh you down. Each morning, you must choose to lift that grudge and bear it throughout the day, sending negative thoughts towards others. It's an exhausting task. It's akin to filling a cup with poison and mailing it to your adversary, hoping they will drink it. It's nonsensical. Why not opt for forgiveness instead? Proceed forward. Focus on your own life and future, and let bygones be bygones. Forgiveness is a gift to yourself. No matter what was inflicted upon you, decide that you've gleaned a valuable lesson and have progressed. If you seek to find meaning from the ordeal, assist others who might have suffered similarly.
Reward Yourself
Indulging in a reward is one of my favorite ways to practice self-love. Do you treat yourself for a job well done, or perhaps for leading a fulfilling life? Go ahead, pamper yourself. Take a day off to visit the spa, purchase a new book, or enjoy a fine dining experience at an upscale restaurant. You're aware of what brings you joy. Additionally, this can serve as a subtle suggestion to those around you about your gift preferences. Would you prefer a gift certificate to your favorite craft store instead of flowers? Absolutely!